Couple of days ago, I was struggling with shoes for an outfit. Wanted to wear my winter-white cords, because it was cold out again. Tried them with a Caslon plaid shirt (Caslon has great blouses with thin, soft material). I added cowboy boots. H’mm. Didn’t like them, I looked too Western. Tried them with a pair of funky Mary Janes. Wasn’t crazy about that either. Took off the belt. Nope. I went with the middle choice: with belt and Mary Janes. Think I should have gone with the cowboy boots.
Last night I was sitting on the couch having a margarita and hanging out with the kids – I was actually working on this post until Lizzie grabbed my iPad and started searching keywords like “vicious casowaries” and “how to keep children as a pet” – when I got a text from a friend: “You’re going to book club, right?” Whoops, I had totally forgotten, so I wrote back saying I was hanging out on the couch and it had slipped my mind. She didn’t give me a choice, just wrote back saying, “I’ll pick you up in five minutes.” So off I went, in the above outfit (which I was already wearing, I didn’t even have time to change…)
After I balked at spring arriving because I’d miss my cozy sweaters, I think God is messing with me: it has been cold and windy and the sweaters have come back out of the closet. Now I’m dying to wear this new white lace skirt I got yesterday at Anne Taylor Loft.
Had a great night out with some friends last night – dinner and drinks at my favorite Southwest restaurant. We sat there for more than four hours.
Anyway, we got to talking about body image, based on a quote my friend DeAnna read online. The quote is by Kate Winslet:
“As a child, I never heard one woman say to me, ‘I love my body.’ Not my mother, my elder sister, my best friend. No one women has ever said, ‘I am so proud of my body.’ So I make sure to say it to Mia, because a positive physical outlook has to start at an early age.”
As mothers of young girls, we talked about how we share our own body images with our daughters. I try to never complain about my body. I never say I look fat in front of my daughter, never say I wish I was taller, or thinner, or whatever. When we shop together, I’ll say that something is not flattering on me, but I make sure to not say, “This makes me look fat.” I compliment her on her appearance all the time, but don’t focus too much on it. In terms of her body, I tell her that if it does what she wants it to do – can she run? can she play? is she able to enjoy PE class and softball practices? – then it’s perfect, in my opinion.
DeAnna said she shares with her daughter the concept of respecting our bodies. They’re amazing! Look what they can do. They get up in the morning and get us to school/work/whatever. Our body thinks and walks and talks and loves, and our heart beats and our guts digest our food and turn it into energy for us. Cool, right?
We also discussed bodies in terms of fashion: if we’re respecting our bodies, what do we put on them? We all said that we try to wear clothes that flatter us, that makes us FEEL good, that express our personalities.
These friends of mine, by the way, are all gorgeous and stylish women themselves. I tried to get them to let me take pictures of their outfits and post them, but they complained about it… But here’s a pic of the top halves of us.
Do you have thoughts about body image? About how we communicate body image to our children? Would love to hear from you.
I love that spring is here. The cool breezes that smell so good, that ultra blue sky, the flowers and blooming trees… But I don’t have many spring clothes. Most of the new wardrobe I bought back in January was winter stuff, though I did make sure to get some short sleeved shirts. But I’ll miss wearing outfits like this (below). I love the Free People sweater — in fact I have this one in white and another in deep purple — so I’ll miss wearing it for the summer. They’re pretty light, actually, so they could be good for summer evenings, except they’re so long in the back, you can’t see my shorts below them, which is not a good look
I like the look of these bright spring colors: hot pink and sherbert green. Plus, the pants were on sale for $15 at Banana Republic! Who could resist? Also, I think the vest, which hits just above my waist, shortens the look of my torso and makes my legs look longer (see more about that here). But here’s how my conversation with Lizzie (13 years old) went:
Is it totally arrogant and self-centered to publish a blog with pictures of myself? I hope not. I haven’t admitted anything about this to my husband, who thinks my fashion obsession is getting out of hand. When I explained why I liked an outfit so much one day, he interrupted me to say, “Honey, you look great. But I’m not a girl.” And my daughter thinks I weird. Or at least she did when I started. Recently she called me “all thin and pretty now,” so maybe she’s becoming more accepting of my new look. Plus, she likes to borrow my clothes.
One of the first things I learned about my body as I started this search for style is that I have a long torso and relatively short legs. Well, I’ve actually always known this, but didn’t know what it meant in terms of fashion or dressing for my body type. I’m starting to see that certain outfits elongate my legs and others make me look short and squat.