Bad Makeup Day, but I Learned…

I totally write stories that are too long. I get chatty. Then I get sidetracked and sail along on the other theme for awhile. Then drag myself back to the point, add five parenthetical phrases, get sidetracked again (thanks, ADHD), totally forget my original idea… Crap. I’m doing it again, aren’t I?  I’ll try to keep it shorter. (Note, I just reread this post and edited it. I may sound like I’m going on too long again, but trust me, this paragraph was a LOT longer.)

Two tips on makeup for MAWs.

Tip #1. Red lipstick is evil. I thought I could brighten up my outlook on life when I felt crappy the other day, so decided to try a new color. Had purchased red lipliner and lipstick recently on a whim. Decided to skip the lipliner (first mistake). Was in a hurry (second mistake). That red stain went everywhere. Not only did it not stay within the lines of my lips, it was crooked and bloody looking and I literally had a streak of lipstick going down about a half inch below the corner of my mouth. NO IDEA how that happened. I tried to wipe it off and start over, but red lipstick (or at least this particular one) does not wipe. It stains. As I was trying to get it off, it ended up on my hands, the counter, and across the entire top of a roll of toilet paper. I AM NOT EXAGGERATING. 

Finally got it semi-normal looking and realized that it’s just not a good color for me. With my fair skin and blue eyes, I look a little too — mmm… — patriotic with red lipstick. Additionally, I look a little mad (as in insane, not angry).

So the tip, I guess, is don’t apply red lipstick in a hurry, apply very carefully, and make sure it’s a good color for you before slathering your lips because that shit does not come off

 

Urban Decay matte lipstick in Bad Blood (the color name should have tipped me off. Sephora, $22.

  
 Tip #2. Eyelid primer is also evil. I had heard that eyelid primer is essential for MAWs because with eyelids that have gotten just slightly less smooth than in our youth, eye shadow tends to wear off. Eyelid primer was supposed to keep it in place all day. The good news: eyelid primer works — I put on my eye shadow and it didn’t move or flake or smudge or disappear. The bad news: eyelid primer works. You put on your eye shadow and it doesn’t move. Not at all.

Why is this a bad thing? Well, if you are a superb eye-shadow artist, it shouldn’t be a problem. But if you rely on using a brush to blend everything together and get rid of imperfections in application, be warned. Once it’s on there, it doens’t blend, because it doesn’t move.

I was experimenting with smokey eyes again (meaning grays and dark blues… in other words, bruise colors), so there I was with blotchy, bruised-looking eyes and no way to blend it to make it better. Along with the lipstick, I was quite a sight. I will forever after refer to it as the “My-husband-beats-me-and-I’m-trying-to-hide-it-and-also-I’m-a-vampire” look.

 

Cover FX Anti Aging Smooth Eyelid Primer, $34 from Sephora

 
I eventually used makeup remover and started over with my eyes, but the lipstick was still a challenge. (By the way, I didn’t buy the eyelid primer. When I was buying something else at Sephora, they asked if I wanted a sample of anything and I asked for eyelid primer. So they put a few squirts of it in a darling little plastic container with a lid. Apparently you can do that. Glad I didn’t buy it.)

But, if you’re looking for eyelid primer that will truly keep your eye shadow in place, and lipstick that really stays on, give ’em a try.

Looking maniacal…

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3 thoughts on “Bad Makeup Day, but I Learned…

  1. Kally Reynolds

    You made me laugh and gave me some practical tips at the same time — no small feat. Bless you! Now I will not buy any eyelid primer, go for bright red lipstick or stop using my lip liner. I’ve heard that the older we get, the softer our makeup is supposed to be; but if it is too soft, I feel I will fade into the woodwork. Please keep writing.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. jennifernastu Post author

      Hi, Kally! Welcome to the site. I’m so glad you got some laughs. I love taking serious topics and giving them humorous spins… or taking humorous topics and letting them speak for themselves. I’ve heard the same thing about softer makeup as we get older, but I don’t think it has to be TOO understated. Maybe try some neutral-ish colors but add a little pop, like Urban Decay’s eye shadows that have a bit of glitter to them. Apply just a bit to the inside corner of your eye, and blend with the rest of the eye shadow: http://www.sephora.com/eyeshadow-P309813?skuId=1402973
      If you try this and like the results, send me a picture. Or if you find something else that works, I’d love to hear about it. Thanks again and I look forward to hearing from you again.

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