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Bulging Eardrums Lead to Middleaged Wisdom

I have nothing witty to share today. I have been sick for more than two weeks. I am on my second round of antibiotics and still feel like my head is going to explode. The pressure on my ears is intense. The doctor says my eardrums are showing the pressure they are under (happens to us all, eventually). I can’t remember if she actually used the word “bulging,” but that’s how it feels: like my eardrums are bulging and may soon simply pop. And they hurt so much that I imagine, if they popped, it might not be a bad thing. I picture my head filled with sludgy swamp water, and if my eardrums pop, it would all drain out. Then maybe I could lean over the kitchen sink and use the sprayer to rinse out the inside of my head. The warm, soapy water would wash out all the sticky bits of shameful memories, useless knowledge, and cobwebs, leaving my whole brain sparkling and new and so, I don’t know… rejuvenated! It would be like coming home from a month-long vacation in the Bahamas, but without the expense. Or the tan.
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